You Know It's Going to be a Polish Day When...

I know it’s going to be a Polish day when…

I go to the post office to buy stamps for three post cards and join the line. In front of me is a lovely older lady (Remember “Uwaga Babcias”?) whose phone suddenly erupts into the Mexican Hat Dance. She quickly pulls out her phone, “twinkles” at me, and steps away to take her call. The line moves slowly forward and just as I think I might be able to step to the window, the lady returns and steps into place as the man at the window walks away. Apparently, she assumed I would save her place in line while she left to answer the phone. She concludes her business quickly and I step to the window ready to buy my stamps. I should have known better! As I step up to the window, a man comes up behind me, waves a device (it turns out to be an inked stamp), the clerk waves him forward, and suddenly I’m second in line—again! Fortunately, his business is concluded quickly and I am able to buy my stamps and leave. I went to catch a bus because I had an appointment. I probably should have just gone back home.

I got to the bus and rode it to the tram stop. Oh no! I’m across the street and one tram I could take is pulling out and the second is pulling in! I cross the street—against the light—and run to catch the tram. Of course, it stops at the far end of the platform. Feeling very proud of my expertise at catching the tram, I settle for the ride to the Metro stop. Oh yes, that’s another indication of a Polish day, I ride the bus, to catch the tram, to get to the Metro. (Hmm, reminds me of a story about a man building a house…)

The Metro trip is uneventful. I arrive at my destination and now my day takes a turn for the worse! I am supposed to meet two friends at one friend’s home. I’ve been there before but, foolishly, I don’t have the apartment number. This is Warsaw and every apartment complex is gated and guarded in some way. Even if you can get inside, you are still stuck if you don’t know the apartment number or have a phone number to call them. I was stuck because I had neither. I should have been able to phone my friend and that was my plan. What I hadn’t planned on was for my phone to be out of minutes! I can receive calls but I can’t make them. Then, just to create a bigger hassle for myself, I turn the phone off and turn it back on but I don’t remember the PIN correctly and get locked out! Now, I’m away from home, at my friend’s house, but I can’t talk to anyone. I try to ask someone for help but my Polish is terrible and the person trying to help me has no English. I have no choice but to get back on the Metro (and then the tram and finally the bus) and head home. I am so frustrated I can hardly stand it!

Some of my trouble today is my own doing and that just adds to the frustration. Some of the trouble is just due to the difference in the way things are done in Poland and the way I’ve been used to doing things for 50+ years. Some of the trouble is simply language-based. It is incredibly frustrating to know you are an intelligent person and still an illiterate in this culture. You are stymied by the simplest things because you don’t have the words to express your need.

As I said at the beginning, I know it’s going to be a Polish day when…